volybal3
08-17-2009, 11:28 PM
Many people decide to forgive their past and accept that change can lead them to a better life, but they still don't change and improve their lives. What happened, or what went wrong?
Getting out of a rut isn't easy. In the past when people used wagons for transportation, the roads where made of dirt. Whenever it rained the roads would get muddy, and when the wagons went by they would leave behind tracks, or ruts.
When the sun hardened the mud, the ruts would remain in the now-dry road. Other wagons riding on that same road would often fall into one of many ruts hardened in the road. If your wagon wheels fell in the wrong rut, the tracks might take you in a different direction, which meant you had to make an extra effort to get your wagon out of that current rut and back in the direction you wanted to go.
Like a rut in a road, getting out of your own rut can take just as much extra effort. If you have a lot of people around to help you, getting out of a rut can be much easier. On the other hand, if a lot of people are telling you to stay in your rut and are criticizing or mocking you when you try to get out, can you see how you might want to just give up?
That is the problem with criticism. Constructive criticism points out your mistakes and guides you into the right direction. Destructive criticism can destroy your initiative and short-circuit your desire. So the next time someone criticizes what you are doing or want to do, ask yourself whether that person is trying to help you or hurt you.
If someone is trying to help you, ask whether that person is qualified to help you in the first place. When I first started, I got all kinds of advice from well meaning people who knew nothing about online business. People warned me that I would lose all my money, that an online business was too complicated, that I needed special training, or that I could loose everything.
If I had listened to those people, I might still be working a job. Now, I’m not exactly rich, yet I’m much better off than I was last year, and it can only get better.
The next time someone offers you advice, find out that person's qualifications. Don't throw away your own dreams based on well meaning but incorrect advice from people who really don't know what they are talking about. If you are going to listen to anybody, listen to successful people who have done or are currently doing what you want to do.
Often it is not the criticism that stops people. It is the desire to be liked by the person doing the criticizing. If your someone criticizes you for wanting to start your own business, for example, you have a choice. Start your own business and risk further criticism from that person, or don't and avoid further criticism. Unfortunately, life doesn't work so neatly. People who criticize mercilessly will continue to do so no matter what your dreams may be.
Negative people are not just criticizing your goals, they are criticizing every goal that anyone might have. My advice is to get that negative person to change his or her mind, learn to ignore that person's criticism, or get away from that person and find a more supportive group.
Getting out of a rut isn't easy. In the past when people used wagons for transportation, the roads where made of dirt. Whenever it rained the roads would get muddy, and when the wagons went by they would leave behind tracks, or ruts.
When the sun hardened the mud, the ruts would remain in the now-dry road. Other wagons riding on that same road would often fall into one of many ruts hardened in the road. If your wagon wheels fell in the wrong rut, the tracks might take you in a different direction, which meant you had to make an extra effort to get your wagon out of that current rut and back in the direction you wanted to go.
Like a rut in a road, getting out of your own rut can take just as much extra effort. If you have a lot of people around to help you, getting out of a rut can be much easier. On the other hand, if a lot of people are telling you to stay in your rut and are criticizing or mocking you when you try to get out, can you see how you might want to just give up?
That is the problem with criticism. Constructive criticism points out your mistakes and guides you into the right direction. Destructive criticism can destroy your initiative and short-circuit your desire. So the next time someone criticizes what you are doing or want to do, ask yourself whether that person is trying to help you or hurt you.
If someone is trying to help you, ask whether that person is qualified to help you in the first place. When I first started, I got all kinds of advice from well meaning people who knew nothing about online business. People warned me that I would lose all my money, that an online business was too complicated, that I needed special training, or that I could loose everything.
If I had listened to those people, I might still be working a job. Now, I’m not exactly rich, yet I’m much better off than I was last year, and it can only get better.
The next time someone offers you advice, find out that person's qualifications. Don't throw away your own dreams based on well meaning but incorrect advice from people who really don't know what they are talking about. If you are going to listen to anybody, listen to successful people who have done or are currently doing what you want to do.
Often it is not the criticism that stops people. It is the desire to be liked by the person doing the criticizing. If your someone criticizes you for wanting to start your own business, for example, you have a choice. Start your own business and risk further criticism from that person, or don't and avoid further criticism. Unfortunately, life doesn't work so neatly. People who criticize mercilessly will continue to do so no matter what your dreams may be.
Negative people are not just criticizing your goals, they are criticizing every goal that anyone might have. My advice is to get that negative person to change his or her mind, learn to ignore that person's criticism, or get away from that person and find a more supportive group.